Emily: "I think my best friend is just jealous of my relationship with my husband"

I never thought my best friend would become jealous of me

Sarah and I had known each other since sophomore year of high school. We shared everything: heartbreak, our first jobs, and eventually motherhood too. But in recent months, something changed. It started small, but gradually I began to notice that Sarah wasn't the same anymore. It seemed as if my relationship with Tom had become some kind of wedge between us.

The first time I felt something

Sarah and I were sitting together in the garden while Tom was playing soccer with the kids. She watched him, how he lifted Max up after a goal and gave Tina a high-five. "Tom is really such a typical dad, isn't he?" she suddenly said, with a tone I couldn't quite place. I laughed. "Yeah, he's crazy about those two." Sarah turned her head toward me. "I don't understand how you don't find that exhausting, that constant fussing of his with the kids. I mean, sometimes you just want some peace and quiet, right?"

"What do you mean?" I asked, a bit surprised

"He actually makes sure I have my hands free sometimes. It's wonderful." She snorted and took a sip of her tea. "Well, it just seems annoying to me if you never have time for yourself. But hey, apparently you don't need that." I didn't quite know what to say. It felt like she was blaming me for something, but I couldn't quite put my finger on the sore spot. Only later, after she left, did that comment stick in my head. It didn't sound like the Sarah I knew.

A few weeks later, something happened that surprised me even more

Tom and I had finally planned a date night. It had been months since we'd gone out together without the kids. I had asked Sarah if she could babysit Tina and Max, and she immediately said yes. When she came in that evening, she looked me up and down. "Well, you've made an effort," she said, as her eyes swept over my new dress. "Tom will be happy that you finally did your hair for once." I felt my cheeks turn red. "Uh, thank you?" I mumbled, not knowing whether it was a compliment or a dig.

When Tom came downstairs, her attitude changed immediately

"Well, there's the lucky man," she said with a broad smile. She gave him an exaggerated wink. Tom laughed uncomfortably and quickly gave her some instructions about the kids, but I felt a strange tension in the air. Once we were gone, Tom even asked: "What was up with Sarah? She was acting a bit... odd." I shrugged, but inside I knew he was right.

The third time it became really clear was at Tina's birthday

We had organized a small party in the garden, and Sarah was there as always. Tom was at the barbecue, busy with burgers and sausages. Sarah came and stood next to me and tapped me on the arm. "You're lucky to have Tom, you know," she said. "Not every man would go to such lengths for a kids' party." I looked at her. "Yeah, he's really a sweetheart," I said, smiling. "I could never handle it," she continued. "That constant presence. It seems suffocating to me. You apparently like that?"

I looked at her, not sure what I was hearing

"Suffocating? Tom actually does a lot for me. He gives me space when I need it." Sarah laughed scornfully. "Oh, sure. But anyway, I'm not the type who wants someone around all the time." She turned around and walked to the snack table, as if the conversation hadn't happened.

A few days after that party, I got a text from Sarah

It was a photo of a flyer for a yoga weekend. "Maybe something for you and Tom?" she wrote with it. At first glance it seemed like a nice gesture, but when I read further, it almost felt like a jab. "Maybe he can finally learn how to relax without taking over everything."

I lowered my phone and stared at the screen

Why was she saying this? Tom wasn't someone who 'took over everything'. He was helpful, present, and caring — qualities I actually valued. But Sarah seemed to see it differently, as if she was painting him as some kind of control freak. That evening I let Tom read it. He just laughed and shook his head. "Sarah probably doesn't mean any harm," he said, but I could see he found it strange too. Still, I didn't want to just let it go. Sarah's comments stayed in the back of my mind, as if she was trying to say something without really saying it.

Perhaps the most frustrating thing was that I didn't know how to handle this

Sarah was my best friend. We shared everything, and yet now it felt like a distance had grown between us that I couldn't bridge. It was as if my happiness with Tom made her unhappy, and as much as I wanted to help her, I didn't know how I could do that without further damaging our friendship.

There was another moment that brought everything to a head

During an evening at Sarah's house, where we were having a glass of wine together, she brought up the subject again. "You know," she began, swirling her glass, "I sometimes wonder how long you two will keep this up. It might sound blunt, but Tom seems a bit... too perfect to me. Do you know what I mean?" I was shocked. "Too perfect?" I asked slowly. "What do you mean by that?"

Sarah shrugged

"Well, nobody is that... caring and helpful without wanting something in return. Maybe it all seems great, but I'd be worried about what he's really thinking. Maybe he has something to hide." I felt my stomach tighten. "Tom is just a good man," I said, almost defensively. "Why would he have something to hide?" Sarah smiled thinly. "Oh, I'm just saying what I think. Sometimes things aren't what they seem, right?"

That evening I went home with a knot in my stomach

Her words echoed in my head, as if she had said something that couldn't be undone. What was she trying to achieve? Was it jealousy?

EMILY